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| Abby playing for her Province. Grade 11 |
When I started writing about this journey inspired by my daughter and sport I assumed it would go on right through her high school basketball experience, maybe further. However as I wrote and arrived at the Grade 8 Provincial Final, I knew this would be the logical conclusion of the story. At least the part that I would write about.
The theme that unfolded in front of me, if there is one hidden deep in this narrative, is something like an age of innocence; daughter and parents experiencing things for the first time, together, but through different lenses. A girl falling into a sport and dragging her parents along with her. The first practices and games, the first coaches both good and bad, the first tryout, the first road trip, the first big victory, the first heartbreaking defeat, and all the emotions that come along with life's first experiences both welcome and unwelcome.
While there were certainly more chapters of humorous episodes and mildly profound lessons that occurred after this, they did not seem to fit in into this theme. It doesn't mean the journey has become less fulfilling, not in the least, it's just that there was no longer the same sense of wonder and mystery as we had all experienced up to this point. This is story about rookies - both player and parents. After "that game" we were all vets.
I had thought about exploring other themes, but they didn't fit either. More than once I started a chapter on the antics of the parents on basketball road trips. While it didn't fit well into the official Chronicles Story, I do need to record a couple of epic tales, in extreme shorthand...just for the historical record...
It became a given that after the last game of the day, and assuming the girls were safely ensconced in their hotel rooms, that the parents would convene in our room to drink wine and socialize, sometimes for hours. A foundation of this activity was a game we invented while travelling in the US - find the best wine you can at the cheapest price. If you could find a quality bottle of, say, J Lohr for $13USD that we pay $26 for at home, or a bottle of Robert Mondavi Chardonnay for $16USD, then you might win. Everyone would present their findings to the group and the ratio of the price in Canada relative to the price in the US was calculated to determine the best value wine and winner of the game. Then we would drink it over the course of the next several hours, share stories, and laugh our fool heads off. After one (not so memorable) party we received a knock on our door early the next morning. Looking through the peephole I recognized Thomas looking mostly dead. I opened the door and he explained he could only find one of his shoes. I found the other one in our trash can and sent him on his way. He did not have fun coaching that day.
Basketball Coach Steve, however, did not understand the "value" goal of the wine game. He thought the object was to find something at the cheapest price point possible that could still be marketed as wine. His favourite price point was $3. If he could find "wine" for $3 he became almost as excited as he did when his team prevented a basket for an entire quarter. He would turn up with wine that featured a picture of a snake or a dragon on the label and proudly announce his minuscule cash outlay to the grave concern of the assembled crowd. Nobody was ever successful in explaining to Coach Steve the actual goal of the wine game, and I'm glad to report we never grew so desperate as to have to open a single bottle of moonshine he brought to us.
There is also the vision of Seamus losing his grip on a flat of juice boxes in Phoenix instantly disintegrating a stack of Styrofoam coolers purchased from Fred Meyer only seconds earlier to contain them. Seamus and his wife Joan have also sealed in my memory the look of shock and horror on their faces as they crossed the threshold of the famous "Billy Goat Tavern" in Chicago. Apparently after my impassioned plea that we all go to this place they were expecting a place with windows, a decor that had been updated sometime since 1950, as well as a menu that featured more than cheeseburgers cooked on an open grill by two sleepy looking dudes in paper hats who looked like they'd been there since the last renovation. Before they could panic and run, I ordered lunch for everyone, which turned out to be delightful.
Then there is poor Bruce Hamlin, who accidentally agreed to join me on a supply run to a Super Wal Mart, also in Phoenix. The place was bigger than the Death Star. After shopping we arrived back to our minivan in the parking lot, in at least 40 degree heat, at which time I could not find my van keys. I stood Bruce up in some shade by the door while I retraced my steps in hopes of finding the keys. No sign of them. Went to the lost and found, nothing. Back to Bruce, he smiled politely as I gave him a bleak update on the situation before heading back inside. At about the second stop where I had been shopping earlier I looked behind the sales counter to find my keys in a little box. I snatched them up and ran out to Bruce to find him guarding our supplies, and sweating. I think he had done the math and arrived at the conclusion that had I not found the keys we would be in the unenviable predicament of being marooned in a Wal Mart parking lot, somewhere in the wilderness of a nameless Phoenix suburb, in unbearable heat with no hope of rescue whatsoever. But as I held the keys victoriously above my head like the Stanley Cup he smiled joyfully and we were off. I have no idea how he did not show panic. I wish I had looked more closely at the little box where I found my keys as I would have also spied my cell phone which I noted as missing in action when I got back to the hotel.
There is the sight of Brent Bourne during our trip to Washington DC. A July so hot and humid there were weather reports coming out nightly about the record breaking temperatures. While we all felt pretty hot, I was not prepared for the sight of Brent as he rounded a street corner to greet us. Someone must have thought he was going to spontaneously combust because it looked like he had taken a fire hose blast fully in the chest. His golf shirt was so soaked through with sweat his wife Kathy was keeping a constant safe distance. And to this day we share giggles about our shared rental car. I discovered a glow in the dark safety handle hanging in the trunk. According to the pictogram on the handle if you were suddenly taken hostage and thrown into the trunk you could subsequently pull the handle to open it then run like hell. Not sure if the car was moving when you did this, or what brilliant perpetrator would leave such an obvious escape route as an option, or why among the four of us we would let one of us be taken hostage...but we share stories to this day about the endless possibilities.
A theme I do hope bubbles up throughout these chapters is that of the gratitude we have for the coaches that have spent thousands of hours dedicating themselves to our young people. My story pays a compliment, I hope, to (most of) the coaches portrayed in it. To coaches Steve (soccer), John, Glen Walters, and Steve (basketball), our deepest thank yous.
But the story ends before we meet others that should be mentioned. After the grade 8 year tryouts for the Junior (grade 10) team took place and most of the grade 8 team decided they would try to "play up" to the Handsworth grade 10 team. The Junior team had two enthusiastic coaches each early in their professional careers and with accomplished high school and university basketball pedigree, coaches Alison (Ali) and Christine (Chris). They held open tryouts and picked their 12 players - 9 grade 9's and 3 grade 10's. Neither knew any of the kids prior to the tryouts, so they unknowingly set off a minor scandal in the Handsworth basketball world. The grade 10's had been almost totally displaced from playing on the grade 10 team. The crisis was solved when a second grade 10 team was formed, but this effectively ended any hope of these girls ever trying out again. Abby's team competed effectively against the grade 10 teams in their league, but due to the fact that most of Abby's one year older 3D player compatriots played for Argyle and Seycove they were also very good. Handsworth pulled off two overtime wins against Seycove, but lost to Argyle both in league and the North Shore Finals. However a spirited victory against Argyle in the Vancouver and Districts put Handsworth and Argyle in opposite sides of the Provincial Tournament draw. Argyle fell to South Kamloops in the semis, and this spelled a re-match between Abby/Handsworth and Emma/South Kamloops in the final. But by now Handsworth was the underdog, and while the game was reasonably close in score Handsworth never held the lead and so Kamloops was the champion again in the Junior year. For these skilled players to lose a year of development playing and crushing everyone in the grade 9 league wouldn't have been right. So our thanks Ali, and Chris for sticking up for our girls who wanted to play up and for guiding them through a great Junior season.
Next was the prospect for the girls to "play up" again as grade 10's cracking the senior team line up. Enter Scott Palmer.
Scott knew he had something special coming up with Abby, Lizzy, Delaney, and Elisa. Combined with seniors Jaime, Ali P., and others, it was quite possible Handsworth could add a third consecutive AAA Provincial victory to the trophy case.
Scott, from the beginning, has been an extraordinary proponent for Abby. He made her the starting point guard for the team in her grade 10 year, knowing the challenges this would bring to such a young player. But he stuck with her, helped her to understand where she needed to develop, but was never afraid to put her in challenging situations.
The drama that ensued over the next 2 senior seasons would take another several chapters to cover. In Abby's grade 10 year the senior team advanced to the Provincials but struggled to beat the teams ranked above them and they came in 7th. Abby's grade 11 year was better, the team had improved, and they won a dramatic early season game against York House to advance to the final of the Telus Classic played at UBC where they fell to Riverside in the final. The Provincial tournament started with heartbreak, the Maple Ridge Ramblers were probably mis-ranked and upset Handsworth in the tournament opener meaning all ideas of winning the Provincials were gone. My heart broke for Jaime, this tournament was her last chance to lead Handsworth onto the floor, and now first place was impossible. But they won out from there, and came in 6th.
Scott, you have consistently made Abby's success in basketball an obvious priority. You have helped her unlock parts of her game and move her skills to the next level. You have promoted her to other coaches and to newspapers and to basically whoever would listen because you knew her game was not all that flashy but still mission critical to her team. You were instrumental in helping her see how a move to the Provincial team program might benefit her. "Our #7", as you have come to call her, has indeed opened her eyes to new possibilities in basketball in no small part because of your dedication to her success. We simply cannot thank you enough. Grade 12 is upcoming. You and #7 got one more shot at it Coach...
Now as Abby experiences basketball in the Provincial program we thank Shaun McGuinness for taking the reins. You saw weaknesses, but also Abby's work ethic, desire to get better, and I think "The Look", and agreed to help her. As I write this the prospect of Abby playing with Team BC in the U17 National Tournament is just around the corner. When I look back on her first few minutes on the basketball court with the Muffin Tops so many years ago I would have assigned less probability to this than me qualifying for my PGA Tour card. Your support of her in the Provincial program, along with that of Ken Olynyk and Joanna Vieira is deeply appreciated.
A special word to 3D Basketball and its superb coaches. I think that when Abby initially did not make the cut for the top team, so many years ago, you caused a reaction in her. I don't think she has ever set foot on the basketball court to prove something to anyone else. But when you found a spot for her on the "top" team in grade 7 she set about proving to herself that she could compete with the best in basketball. I didn't know why then, and I don't know now. All I know is that, Thomas and Ramin, you guys were the first to inspire her love of the game and you have been in her corner ever since, and for that we thank you.
Coach Steve, somehow, did not throw in the towel after the Final. We had a very subdued "party" at his home that same evening to celebrate the season. And just in case the situation did not seem sad enough, Coach Steve's wife, Coach Shawn, watched her Argyle Junior team go down in a heartbreakingly close Provincial final against Seycove that same afternoon. While the players from both teams sat in the basement and held some sort of counselling session in the dark the parents sat upstairs, and, failing to find a true silver lining to the whole scenario, decided instead to get drunk. I think Sophie's dad complained the next day from being "over-served", which sounded like an excellent way to blame a hangover on someone else. When I found out that Coach Steve would indeed be back at coaching the following year I immediately went out and bought Johnson and Johnson stock at about $50. Despite the financial crisis that ensued since, it's now worth $68, or about a 9% annual gain. Keep up the sanitizing Steve, my RRSP depends on it.
Jaime continues to light the path a year in front of Abby. Having played together for two years on the Handsworth squad, Jaime also played for the Provincial team the summer prior to Abby which I'm sure was instrumental in #7 deciding to take the Provincial Team path as well. Now Jaime is off to play for UBC, and we will be at every home game. James, your inspirational nature both on and off the court is extraordinary, and I think a bunch of this is rubbing off on Abs through osmosis. So you can't necessarily see it, but it's definitely happening. I suppose it's possible you two will have to play against each other in CIS play in the upcoming years. We don't know yet. But, if true, that's just going to look...weird.
And just to mention an ironic development; after battling each other in 3 consecutive Provincial finals Emma and Abby are now playing together on Team BC and have formed a friendship, which, given their similarities other than height, is not that surprising. South Kam won the 2012 AAA Provincials in a fantastic contest against York House. Since it couldn't be Handsworth, we were thrilled it was you.
I hope this story has served its purpose. I wanted to record these ridiculous and profound experiences for our family so that we would not forget the nuances of this journey with the passing of years. I'm pleased, and partly shocked, that others have appreciated the story too and can relate it to themselves, especially those friends and coaches and Abby's teammates who were there in real time.
And to Abby, who simply by living her life with joy and passion inspired me to write this story, I hope as the years pass you will look back fondly on this and maybe share it someday with your own child athlete (or dancer or scholar or actor or whatever). That look in your eye, when someone else has the basketball and you want it, is a great asset. It reveals the depth of passion that you have in your soul.
Abs, one piece of advice which, of course, is completely unsolicited as usual. You are about to enter your grade 12 year. I promise you that your senior year in high school, and those following in university, will be the years that streak by you at the fastest speed of your life. Valuable details fade from memory quickly. If you see something happening in front of you that you think is unique in how funny, or profound, or ridiculous, or joyful or painful it is for god sake take a minute to take a picture of it, or write it down...or, preferably, both.
Dad.
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| The Look. |
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